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#8
Cell Phone Gun
Inventors Description: An electronic device (cell phone) with a concealed firearm. The device includes a housing having an interior face and an exterior face and with a cavity therein. The housing has a plurality of buttons and digital electronics. A tubular wall with a rigid central bore is adapted to function as the barrel of a firearm. Primary electronic components are provided including electronic elements to allow the bullet to be discharged upon a first instruction from at least one of the buttons.
Yep! It's a cell phone, it's a gun, it's both! Uumm..maybe I'll let that guy talk to his stock broker for a feewwww more minutes....
Patented Aug 14, 2004
Cell Phone Gun
Inventors Description: An electronic device (cell phone) with a concealed firearm. The device includes a housing having an interior face and an exterior face and with a cavity therein. The housing has a plurality of buttons and digital electronics. A tubular wall with a rigid central bore is adapted to function as the barrel of a firearm. Primary electronic components are provided including electronic elements to allow the bullet to be discharged upon a first instruction from at least one of the buttons.
Yep! It's a cell phone, it's a gun, it's both! Uumm..maybe I'll let that guy talk to his stock broker for a feewwww more minutes....
Patented Aug 14, 2004
#7
Bed Protection Device
Inventor's Description: A protective bed includes a shield comprising bullet-proof and impact resistance material that surrounds a metal frame. The shield operably separates to provide access to an interior sleeping area. Quick access doors are located on either side of the bed. A ventilation system provides for climate control as well as filtering harmful substances from the air. A rebreather scrubs carbon dioxide from air within the unit to allow a user to close the unit to outside air.
Probably meant to protect the user from terrorist attacks, but will probably end up a "birth control device" to the parents of teenage daughters! Her boyfriend can sneak into the house if he wants, but what's he going to do? Does the unit include steel underwear, too?
Patented: February 6, 2004
Bed Protection Device
Inventor's Description: A protective bed includes a shield comprising bullet-proof and impact resistance material that surrounds a metal frame. The shield operably separates to provide access to an interior sleeping area. Quick access doors are located on either side of the bed. A ventilation system provides for climate control as well as filtering harmful substances from the air. A rebreather scrubs carbon dioxide from air within the unit to allow a user to close the unit to outside air.
Probably meant to protect the user from terrorist attacks, but will probably end up a "birth control device" to the parents of teenage daughters! Her boyfriend can sneak into the house if he wants, but what's he going to do? Does the unit include steel underwear, too?
Patented: February 6, 2004
#10
Ballistic Missle Protector For Civilians
Inventor's Description: A ballistic resistant body covering for protecting the torso, groin and neck area from ballistic missiles. The ballistic resistant body covering includes a torso portion having a front plate and a back plate. Each of the plates is securely coupled together. The torso portion has a neck opening, a pair of arm openings and a torso opening. A groin portion has a generally cup-shape and a pair of leg openings therein. A fastening member releasably couples a top edge of the groin portion to a bottom edge of the torso portion. Each of the torso and groin portions comprises a ballistic resistant material.
Ballistic Missle Protector For Civilians
Inventor's Description: A ballistic resistant body covering for protecting the torso, groin and neck area from ballistic missiles. The ballistic resistant body covering includes a torso portion having a front plate and a back plate. Each of the plates is securely coupled together. The torso portion has a neck opening, a pair of arm openings and a torso opening. A groin portion has a generally cup-shape and a pair of leg openings therein. A fastening member releasably couples a top edge of the groin portion to a bottom edge of the torso portion. Each of the torso and groin portions comprises a ballistic resistant material.
#9
Device To Prevent People From Biting Or Spitting At You
Inventor's Description: Apparatus and method for spit and bite protection from dangerous persons: The inventive apparatus and method of use thereof remedies at least some of the problems and dangers associated with applying restraint holds to violent and/or struggling persons by protecting restraining or escorting personnel from harm that may be inflicted on them by the target person during and after application of restraint holds (such as spitting and biting). The inventive protective apparatus advantageously comprises an collar (for example a cervical collar) that protects and stabilizes the person's neck and prevents neck injuries and head-butting, and a readily deployable face shield that attaches to the cervical collar and that prevents the person from spitting on and/or biting the staff members. The face shield may be permanently or releasably attached to the collar.
Device To Prevent People From Biting Or Spitting At You
Inventor's Description: Apparatus and method for spit and bite protection from dangerous persons: The inventive apparatus and method of use thereof remedies at least some of the problems and dangers associated with applying restraint holds to violent and/or struggling persons by protecting restraining or escorting personnel from harm that may be inflicted on them by the target person during and after application of restraint holds (such as spitting and biting). The inventive protective apparatus advantageously comprises an collar (for example a cervical collar) that protects and stabilizes the person's neck and prevents neck injuries and head-butting, and a readily deployable face shield that attaches to the cervical collar and that prevents the person from spitting on and/or biting the staff members. The face shield may be permanently or releasably attached to the collar.
#6
A "See Through Door" Flashlight
Inventor's Description: "The Instant Savior": A personal security device incorporated into a conventional flashlight for informing a person, by remote control means, who is outside the door of the house, and indicating by a picture, whether it is a man, woman or child, the picture appearing on a view screen of a unit mounted on the flashlight, so that a person is thus cautioned against opening the door, particularly if there is a man outside.
This device was patented in the 1970's, so we're not quite sure how the technology was supposed to work. But if you have a fear of cowboys (look closely at the pic), this is the miracle product for you!
Patented January 11, 1977.
A "See Through Door" Flashlight
Inventor's Description: "The Instant Savior": A personal security device incorporated into a conventional flashlight for informing a person, by remote control means, who is outside the door of the house, and indicating by a picture, whether it is a man, woman or child, the picture appearing on a view screen of a unit mounted on the flashlight, so that a person is thus cautioned against opening the door, particularly if there is a man outside.
This device was patented in the 1970's, so we're not quite sure how the technology was supposed to work. But if you have a fear of cowboys (look closely at the pic), this is the miracle product for you!
Patented January 11, 1977.
#5
Mobile Robot Intruder Detector
Inventor's Description: A mobile detection system for detecting a fire, intruder, or other abnormal condition in a house or an office, and for alerting a central monitor, fire station, police station, or an occupant who is away from the house or office. The mobile detection system comprises a self-propelled movable robot having sensors located thereon. A monitor receives signals from the robot and alerts an authorized user accordingly.
This device is supposed to scare away intruders, but it looks more like R2D2's long lost cousin with some sort of a thyroid problem.
Patented February 18, 1993.
Mobile Robot Intruder Detector
Inventor's Description: A mobile detection system for detecting a fire, intruder, or other abnormal condition in a house or an office, and for alerting a central monitor, fire station, police station, or an occupant who is away from the house or office. The mobile detection system comprises a self-propelled movable robot having sensors located thereon. A monitor receives signals from the robot and alerts an authorized user accordingly.
This device is supposed to scare away intruders, but it looks more like R2D2's long lost cousin with some sort of a thyroid problem.
Patented February 18, 1993.
#1
Non-Human Detector
Inventor's Description: Automated surveillance monitor of non-humans in real time: A system for non human animal-based surveillance including a non-human animal-borne, non-human animal noise sensor, and a non-human animal noise analyzer operative to receive sensed non-human animal noises, to determine at least partially therefrom whether an alarm situation exists and to provide an alarm indication output.
Non-Human Detector
Inventor's Description: Automated surveillance monitor of non-humans in real time: A system for non human animal-based surveillance including a non-human animal-borne, non-human animal noise sensor, and a non-human animal noise analyzer operative to receive sensed non-human animal noises, to determine at least partially therefrom whether an alarm situation exists and to provide an alarm indication output.
#4
A Wearable Device That Tells You If You're Frightened (Read The Description At Your Own Risk)
Inventor's Description: "Providing an alarm in response to a determination that a person may have suddenly experienced fear." A computer system processes physiological data signals provided by a physiological-condition monitoring system to determine whether the person may have suddenly experienced fear by comparing the monitored physiological data with stored stress profile data for the person that is based upon measurements of the monitored physiological conditions of the person during situations of stress and/or upon statistical classification in view of a combination of predetermined characteristics of the person. When such processing by the computer system determines that the person may have suddenly experienced fear, the computer system activates an alarm indicator. The computer system includes a neural network for modifying the stored stress profile data in response to an input signal indicating that the computer system provided a false alarm indication. The surrounding conditions that may have caused the determination of probable fear are recorded and transmitted to a remote location.
Our brains hurt just looking at that picture...couldn't you just say "I'm frightened?"
Patented: October 3, 1995
A Wearable Device That Tells You If You're Frightened (Read The Description At Your Own Risk)
Inventor's Description: "Providing an alarm in response to a determination that a person may have suddenly experienced fear." A computer system processes physiological data signals provided by a physiological-condition monitoring system to determine whether the person may have suddenly experienced fear by comparing the monitored physiological data with stored stress profile data for the person that is based upon measurements of the monitored physiological conditions of the person during situations of stress and/or upon statistical classification in view of a combination of predetermined characteristics of the person. When such processing by the computer system determines that the person may have suddenly experienced fear, the computer system activates an alarm indicator. The computer system includes a neural network for modifying the stored stress profile data in response to an input signal indicating that the computer system provided a false alarm indication. The surrounding conditions that may have caused the determination of probable fear are recorded and transmitted to a remote location.
Our brains hurt just looking at that picture...couldn't you just say "I'm frightened?"
Patented: October 3, 1995
#3
Compressed Gas Device For Signalling Distress
Inventor's Description: "Compressed gas visual notification device for signaling distress": A compressed gas visual notification device for signaling distress is provided. The compressed gas dispersal receptacle member also includes a quantity of aerosol, non-toxic micro-dispersion colored particles therein for adding color to the compressed gas. Actuation of the firing mechanism activates the air actuator shell so that the compressed gas and colored particles are released into the atmosphere as a visual notification device.
.....just fart at your assailant! It's just as effective, and much cheaper!
Patented: June 4, 2002
Compressed Gas Device For Signalling Distress
Inventor's Description: "Compressed gas visual notification device for signaling distress": A compressed gas visual notification device for signaling distress is provided. The compressed gas dispersal receptacle member also includes a quantity of aerosol, non-toxic micro-dispersion colored particles therein for adding color to the compressed gas. Actuation of the firing mechanism activates the air actuator shell so that the compressed gas and colored particles are released into the atmosphere as a visual notification device.
.....just fart at your assailant! It's just as effective, and much cheaper!
Patented: June 4, 2002
#2
Self Defence Stick..errr....Baton, Sorry
Inventor's Description: "Baton": A generally cylindrical baton having a center of gravity displaced from its longitudinal axis reducing the tendency of the baton to roll when laid on a generally horizontal supporting surface. The baton includes a flat end which permits the baton to rest vertically on a generally horizontal supporting surface and a handle operatively connected to a substantially rigid band secured between the ends of the baton which slides along the length of the baton permitting the baton to be easily concealed while being carried.
This is the most detailed description of a stick we've ever seen...this person is a genius!
Patented: Dec 18, 1997
Self Defence Stick..errr....Baton, Sorry
Inventor's Description: "Baton": A generally cylindrical baton having a center of gravity displaced from its longitudinal axis reducing the tendency of the baton to roll when laid on a generally horizontal supporting surface. The baton includes a flat end which permits the baton to rest vertically on a generally horizontal supporting surface and a handle operatively connected to a substantially rigid band secured between the ends of the baton which slides along the length of the baton permitting the baton to be easily concealed while being carried.
This is the most detailed description of a stick we've ever seen...this person is a genius!
Patented: Dec 18, 1997
Top 10 Most Bizarre Security Inventions:
Yes,
these are real security and alarm protection inventions, recently
patented at the U.S. patent office. Don't leave home without them!
The
age-old social custom of biting and spitting in the face of people you
meet should really go the way of the dinosaurs. Come on, people, it's
the 21st century! Perhaps if everyone wore a device like this, it would
bring much needed attention to this issue.
Patented: April 4, 2002
Patented: April 4, 2002
Okay, so judging by the picture provided, this is how the whole operation is set up:
1. Build a nuclear power generator to provide power for the system.
2. Build a giant air craft that resembles a cloud with the word "network" written on it.
3. Fly the craft to 50,000 feet.
4. Attach the dog to the cloud craft with string.
5. If you hear the dog bark, something is wrong and you'll be alerted.
Patented June 29, 2004
1. Build a nuclear power generator to provide power for the system.
2. Build a giant air craft that resembles a cloud with the word "network" written on it.
3. Fly the craft to 50,000 feet.
4. Attach the dog to the cloud craft with string.
5. If you hear the dog bark, something is wrong and you'll be alerted.
Patented June 29, 2004
Remember,
you and/or your family could be hit by ballistic missiles at any time
without warning. Protect yourself today, or at the very least,
duck and cover!
Patented February 9, 2001
Patented February 9, 2001
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